The Destiny Project
A Transformational Journey for Women

The Destiny Project is an eight-week, communal coaching journey toward naming and designing your life around your deepest life purpose. Through this teleconference journey, our certified facilitators will guide you through the 8 practical steps of our proven Visioneering Process that will break you out of stuck patterns in your life, reawaken your heart’s capacity to dream, guide you to create a crystal-clear vision for your future, and provide practical tools for stepping up to the bigger life you were created to live.

Participating in a Destiny Project Group may be one of the most significant explorations of your life. It is an exploration not merely of your career path (though that will certainly play a part), nor is it just about balancing the many tasks and roles you must fulfill in your daily routine (though that is certainly important). This journey will take you deeper than personality tests and time management programs can go–to an exploration of who you really are at the core, what really makes you come alive, and what big gift lives inside of you that, if unleashed, will inspire the world around you to come alive as well.

  • You’ll discover your deepest life purpose, and describe it in detail.
  • You’ll “map” out your dreams for the life you most want to experience and enjoy.
  • You’ll transform your dreams into specific, clearly-defined visionary goals that you can and will achieve.
  • You’ll forge accountable friendships with others just like you—women who’ve had enough of living small, and are committed to stepping up to the life of their biggest dreams.
  • You’ll learn practical tools to move beyond the obstacles that have historically stopped you from your goals.
  • You’ll “plan for success” by designing a practical, personalized road map to get you from where you are to where you want to be.
  • You’ll move from what you want to do to what you will do.
  • And much more!

Length: Seven 1.5-hour group sessions, and three triad calls
Format: Teleconference
Maximum Group Size: 6-9
Standard Rate: $350 (Scholarship rate available)
Next Course Scheduled: GROUP FORMING NOW for June 2009

Contact Wendy to register or to discuss whether or not  The Destiny Project is right for you.


I’m curious…and its only been in the last few years that I’ve allowed myself such a luxury. The old adage “curiosity killed the cat” ruled the day and also described my desire to not “pry” into people’s space with too many questions. Although my intent was honorable in my own eyes, I was actually missing out on the whole world of inquiry. When I first realized that I could ask “why,” I was amazed at how much of the world opened up to me. Who knew you could ask such a question and actually expect and receive an answer?

Next question was “what.” Open ended questions start with “what,” and, again, another whole part of the universe exploded into my consciousness. Am I the only one on the planet who didn’t know I could question the world around me?

I’ll tell you what I did know…faith. In the absence of “prying” questions, I dug deep for information based on intuition, faith and trust. I would not trade those years of observation and study for anything…and I am now looking to integrate these two worlds of inquiry into some kind of seamless existence.

So I noticed something today. I asked a question and did not shrink back when my internal feedback loop didn’t support me. You know, when you put yourself “out there” and then don’t feel the supportive “good job” from your own soul. This is cool! Now I’m curious about this and want to experience this kind of confidence more. What if my question went past the point of reason? What if I went too far? Wow, I love this! Its like a vast experiment where I get to learn by trying…and making mistakes…and its okay!

My curiosity is getting to the point that I’m heading in many directions at once. I want to learn everything and understand all the whys, too. I love it.

My challenge: What about you? Are you able to ask “why” and “what” questions of the world around you? If you could ask anything, what would you ask? Who would you ask it of? Why not ask – today!

Christmas! I hate Christmas!!!

These were the words of a *friend who did a system interview with me late last year. We were identifying what was currently true about her family system and the most obvious and painful reality was that Christmas was a difficult holiday to navigate with any success. As we explored why that was so, it soon became evident that her family had an extensive list of unspoken rules that governed the holiday. We started to list the rules and soon filled up one page, then another with all the activities, behavior and expectations that had become the norm for Christmas with the family.

After filling the second page, we stopped and reflected on what had been listed so far. Hmmm…one family member always got sick and didn’t come to Christmas day family events, another family member was expected to dress up in a funny costume for the younger kids, Christmas day itself was frenetic because it had to be celebrated with mom’s family and dad’s family at separate times and locations, extravagant gifts were expected, etc.

Acknowledging that these rules existed was huge. Here was an example of a potential place in my friend’s family system where a small change could make a big difference (a leverage point). After reflecting some more on the rules that had come to light, my friend had some decisions to make.

What rules did she actually like? Which rules did she not want to follow anymore? What rules would she like to create for the Christmas holidays? Here was where the rubber met the road…she was at full choice on how she would relate to the family and the family rules.

This was a place of leverage for my friend and she took the challenge to utilize it by choosing how she would relate to these rules from now on.

What about you? Think of a system that you are currently a part of (family, community, work, city, church, non-profit, etc.), allow yourself some reflection time to notice what rules are present in this system and list the rules that come to mind – both spoken and unspoken. What did you discover? Were you surprised?

Now, which rules do you want to support? Which rules do you want to change? Which rules will you address in the system? How will you live your life differently now that you are more aware of and conscious of the rules that run your system…and maybe even run you?

My challenge: Pick one rule that you want to address and take action. Which one will it be?


Please let me know if you take the challenge…and what happened!!!

*Shared by permission.

I saw the following video posted on a friend’s blog today and was struck by the deeply systemic view of life held by Jose Antonio Abreu, a Venezuelan who created a deeply influential movement to change the culture in his country through music. Please take a look at this 16 minute video for yourself and see what you notice about Jose’s view of culture and his method of bringing transformation to a whole country.

Click here to view the video at

Who knew music could transform families, bring social justice, and influence a social system so profoundly?

What are you passionate about? How are your skills and passionate pursuits influencing your social systems? Or are they?

Kaoma, Zambia

Kaoma, Zambia

Some people would call it “flying by the seat of your pants.” In Africa, I think its just the way it is. It was around 1993 and Lorraine and I had just spent two days at the Luampa Mission Hospital compound in Zambia, Africa. We were now heading back to the rest of our group in the capital city of Lusaka. It was literally a long, straight road from Kaoma (the nearest town to the mission hospital) to the capital, and supposedly a bus making this 6-8 hour trip was coming through Kaoma that morning. Our host took us to the bus stop in time for the bus…or so we thought. After asking around to confirm the bus schedule, there did not seem to be anyone in the area confident that the bus was actually coming that morning, or that day. As Lorraine and I stood there not quite sure what to do and our host ready to leave us to our own devices, a yellow, full-sized school bus pulled up in front of where we stood. The school bus was pulling a large lawry truck behind it. Several men got out of the bus and seemed to be adjusting the connection between the bus and the truck and adding fuel to the bus. I say “seemed” because I noticed the activity from a distance but was more concerned that our host was about to leave us and we had no confirmed way back to Lusaka.

But where I saw distraction, our host saw opportunity. She quickly walked up to the men and asked where they were going. They were going to Lusaka. Would they be willing to take us as passengers? They said yes. Somewhere in the interchange I became aware of our other travel companion, a Zambian doctor leaving his employ at the mission hospital in search of better wages as a doctor in the mines. He was to be our escort.

Our host informed us that the bus and truck were being taken to Lusaka by these men from Zimbabwe and that we were welcome to ride with them. I must say I was trepidatious of the thought of riding with these unknown men and yet it appeared that this was the way for us to take. We said goodbye to our host, greeted our new hosts, and boarded the bus with our travel bags.

We ended up sitting in the middle of the empty bus, the three of us in our own chosen seats, while four of the men sat in the front of the bus, three of them talkatively grouped around the driver, and the other three packed into the cab of the lawry truck we were pulling. As we started on the trip, it was fun to watch the men in the lawry through the windows in the back of the bus. They had the challenging role of steering the truck as the bus moved forward. They also seemed to be having a blast in the process as they kept laughing as we started moving forward, the lawry bumping along sometimes like a bucking bronco.

I see now that it was at this point in our journey that we entered into an open and spacious experience. We settled into our day long ride which ended up consisting of casual talk, interesting views of the countryside, and passage through a guarded checkpoint to a national park. We stopped twice that I can remember. Once to exchange empty coke bottles at a road side shop and once to eat on the side of the road. Wow – what a meal! We were invited to partake of the precooked food brought out from covered plastic bowls. It was the same authentic fare I had been experiencing during my stay in Zambia – Nshima and chunks of cooked beef eaten with our hands. My favorites! A bottle of fizzy coca cola topped the meal off.

Lorraine and I also took this opportunity to relieve ourselves by swishing through the five foot reeds that were along the side of the road to where we could no longer see the bus or anyone else. We figured if we couldn’t see them then they probably couldn’t see us!

Looking back at this snapshot in time, it is interesting to note that even though the doctor was to be our escort as we traveled, our escorts actually turned out to be the seven men from Zimbabwe. The four of them before us and the three of them behind us. We were surrounded…and it was good. They were like angels escorting us to our destination in a spacious bus, with food service and privacy to pee. What more could you ask for on the road to Lusaka?!

By the way, about two hours after we started the trip, a bus about half the length of the school bus and literally jam packed with people passed us on its way to Kaoma. Lorraine and I both saw it and looked at each other in amazement…just think, we might have still been waiting for that exact bus to arrive in Kaoma. I imagined what it would have been like to be packed in like sardines on the road to Lusaka…

Thank God for yellow buses and men like angels!

Sleeping on the overnight train from Bhopal to Madras, India was a challenge. The night time air was crisper than the warm January days and the *punjabi clothing I wore was just substantial enough to keep me comfortable for sleeping. With my sheer **duppatta over me to give some semblence of a blanket, I finally drifted off to sleep as the train clacked along the tracks.

At some point in the night I awoke with a start. I saw the back of an Indian man, dressed in a khaki travel suit, walking away from my berth. I was stunned to realize he had just kissed me on the cheek!

Far from enjoying this as a travel adventure, I was afraid. The best I could do was call out “Hey!” as I watched the man’s retreating back. Mukesh, who was in the berth across the aisle, sleepily sat up. He realized something had happened but was not sure what. So much for protection! Kari, also a part of my travel group, heard my cry as well. She told me the next morning that she had spent the rest of the night afraid…wondering what had happened.

It is now over a decade since this memorable kiss and I smile and laugh now as I tell the story. I’ve actually begun to wonder if that was an angel, giving me a sweet reminder that even in the darkest and remotest places I am seen and known by God. But, at the time, I had no such thoughts. I felt violated, afraid and unsafe. I spent the rest of the night with the duppatta over my head.

They say that time heals. I disagree. It is not time that heals, but what takes place over time that makes the difference. What I know now that I did not know then, was that a true sense of safety is something internal and not something dependent on my circumstances or who I am with. 

When do you feel the most safe? The most free to embark on adventure or try new things? Please share.

*aka salwar kameez – long, knee length shirt and matching pants
**long length of material worn around the neck, meant to cover the chest

I arrived at Caribou Coffee ready for our monthly advisory board meeting – preparing for a conference to be held in 2009. As we sat down and settled in with our coffee or tea, one of the ladies started talking about a huge change that had taken place since Obama was elected the prior Tuesday. She enthusiastically shared how for the first time in her life, she felt there was an “us” that she was a part of in the U.S. She felt included and a part of the country in a way she never had before. She also mentioned that there was now no excuse for holding back or not going for her dreams. This was also something she had heard from others in the days after the election.

After this enthusiastic reveal, the rest of us went around the table to check in with what was going on with each of us before we got down to business. I was next at the table and shared how I had been challenged to say “yes” to change on a personal level in the past week. Another woman mentioned that she had had a breakthrough and that her fear was gone. Another said that she was finally able to successfully follow a diet without being tempted and giving in. Another said that for the first time she could say she was proud to be an American.

Each of the other women acknowledged that the election of Obama had had a major impact on their life in some way. I sat there stunned. Never had I heard such a report after any other election in my lifetime! It felt like testimony time at a revival meeting!

revival [ri-vahy-vuh l] -noun
1. restoration to life, consciousness, vigor, strength, etc.

Here was an example of a change in leadership of a system (United States) having an impact on the system.

How has this change in leadership affected you? What impact do you see this change having in your life and the people you know?